Santa And His Teacher

Teacher: What is the axis of the Earth?

Santa: The axis of the Earth is an imaginary line which passes from one pole to the other, and on which the Earth revolves.

Teacher: Very good. Now, could you hang clothes on that line?
Santa: Yes, sir.

Teacher: Indeed, and what sort of clothes?

Santa: Imaginary clothes, sir

Santa And His Boss

Santa sent SMS to his BOSS: Me sick, no work


Boss SMS back: When I am sick I kiss my wife try it


2 hours later sardar sms 2 boss: Me ok, ur wife very sweet

Santa and A Professor

Professor:Chemical symbol of Barium?
Sardar: BA

Professor:For sodium?
Sardar: NA

Professor:What will we get if 1 atom of BA
& 2 atoms of NA combined?
Sardar: BANANA

SANTA AND DOCTOR's PRESCRIPTION

Santa Singh: "My doctor told me to drink carrot juice after a hot bath to cure my cold."

Banta Singh: "Does it work?"

Santa Singh: "I don't know... I can never finish drinking the hot bath."

STEVEN SPIELBERG v/s A CHINESE

A Chinese and Steven Spielberg were drunk in a bar. Spielberg suddenly slapped the Chinese.. Chinese: why? Spielberg: Because you bombed Pearl Harbor! My father died there! Chinese: But I am Chinese, not Japanese. Spielberg: You fool! Chinese, Japanese, Vietnamese, Taiwanese, you are all the same. The Chines punched Spielberg. Spielberg: Why did you do that? Chinese: That's for sinking the Titanic. Spielberg: But Titanic was sunk by an iceberg, stupid! Chinese: Iceberg, carlsberg, spielberg, you are all the same!!

FLYING BLONDE

A blonde went to a flight school insisting she wanted to learn
to fly.
As all the planes were currently in use, the owner agreed to
instruct her by radio on how to pilot the solo helicopter.

He took her out, showed her how to start it and gave her the
basics, and sent her on her way. After she climbed 1000 feet,
she radioed in. "I'm doing great! I love it! The view is so
beautiful, and I'm starting to get the hang of this."

After 2000 feet, she radioed again, saying how easy it was
to fly. The instructor watched her climb over 3000 feet, and
was beginning to worry that she hadn't radioed in.

A few minutes later, he watched in horror as she crashed about
half a mile away. He ran over and pulled her from the wreckage.

When he asked what happened, she said, "I don't know!
Everything was going fine, but as I got higher, I was starting
to get cold. I can barely remember anything after I turned
off the big fan!"